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Which, looking back on things, probably set me up for trouble with this group. I told her I didn’t, but had given it some thought. But I felt myself being drawn inexorably into the discussion, like a moth to the flames, so I explained my reasoning. “That’s weird,” they said, “and it sounds dangerous.” I started to explain, but my heart wasn’t in it.
After a while, W decided she wanted to nurse (at almost 9 months of age! An out-of-place-looking mom who’d been eyeing me curiously from across the room for some time came over and sat shyly next to me. Emboldened by my reply, she told me she’d birthed at home. I already liked this woman, and had been starting to envision a lovely, mom-friend future together. I wasn’t trying to change her mind about vaccinating. To know that I had reasons for making the decisions I did, just as I was sure she had reasons for making the decisions she did. “That’s just weird,” she said, “and you’re endangering your baby.” She walked away. I told them the truth: sometimes she plays by herself and I get a few minutes. Lately, I told them, she’s had an obsession with crawling around after a meal, picking up little pieces of food off the floor and eating them. Within moments, they’d drawn up into a tighter circle — with me outside it — and were talking about the videos and talking toys they planned to buy their babies for Christmas.
I lamely tried to dodge the question with a non-sequitur: “I don’t much like my pediatrician,” I said, hoping to change the subject. They wanted to know which Baby Einstein videos I had her watch each day.
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She also breastfed and co-slept, and like me, she worried about things like when to night-wean. I was just starting to ponder how to ask whether she wanted to see me again when she asked THE QUESTION. We’d swap tips on the best farmers’ markets, which second-hand clothing stores were having sales, and the most effective detergent for cloth diapers. I chatted with a few of the women seated near me, who remarked on W’s “advanced” abilities (are they? She crawls around and eats books, for the most part). Our Free Online Dating service gives you a variety of members from different location across the country so you can be sure that someone will catch your eye.